Synopsis: Max, a bright but pathological voyeur, sets out to expose all the town’s dirty, little secrets, only to capture a shocking affair that throws his practice into question.
DISCLAIMER: This is a work of fan fiction borrowing characters from the Pokémon universe, which is trademarked by The Pokémon Company. I do not claim ownership over any of the characters or settings and make no money from publishing this story.
WARNING: This work of fiction is Rated MA and only suitable for mature audiences. It may contain explicit language, adult themes and graphic descriptions of a violent and/or sexual nature.
Under Covers Investigator
Chapter 5 – Show and Tell
May rested the back of her head on Norman’s lap, who had sat cross-legged on her mattress. She couldn’t see her bedroom ceiling through the dark but heard rainfall drumming on the roof louder than her own thoughts. This was not how she’d expected her last night in Petalburg to go.
She felt a large but tender hand stroke the damp hair sprawled over his lap. Norman, Norman, Norman. What was she going to do about him? His commanding presence made her heart all warm and fuzzy, and not entirely in a fatherly kind of way. He was a dangerous man, a fearsome Trainer, a strict disciplinarian, and yet she’d never felt safer or freer lying in his arms. Even as a little girl, she remembered thinking Mom had struck gold with him. Fast forward a decade, and here they were lounging on her bed together.
“You’re gorgeous,” he whispered huskily in the dark. His lips touched her forehead, sending a red rush to her cheeks he’d never see.
A gorgeous traitor. May couldn’t face her mother after what she’d done, after what she was likely going to do again before the storm was over. When Max had confirmed his departure date, she’d fast-tracked her own to avoid an empty, awkward home.
Then, somehow, Norman had made sense of this idea to elope on a pokémon journey. May worried she’d one day wake up in a tent alone after he’d have come to realise he was in a mid-life crisis and scampered back to his old life. But maybe she was worrying too much, thinking too far ahead. Maybe it was enough their epiphanies had conspired to thrust them into this tantalisingly twisted timeline. Maybe she was better off letting the adventure whisk them off to wherever it may. Maybe.
“The show must go on,” Norman said.
The ‘show’ involved him stretching his long arms across the bed, grabbing her round the ankles, and hauling her legs back so far her feet nearly grazed her ears. Her nightdress flipped onto her tummy and invited a cold waft to her nether regions. She posed the flexibility to bear the precarious position with mild discomfort. Then, at the foot of her bed, the Xtransceiver flashed back on.
Max’s ghostly face emerged in the spotlight aimed at her crotch. With her legs parted and pulled back, she could practically see the reflection of her thong in his spectacles. It was astonishing to observe how much of an interest he’d taken in her private parts. The crack in his persona ran deeper than the crack afflicting his right lens, giving him the appearance of a disturbed Poindexter.
May couldn’t help shoulder some blame for her contribution in shaping his perversions. After Dad abandoned them, and Mom dumped Norman, he’d been left no reliable father figure to look up to. May couldn’t have filled that void either but, as his big sister, she could’ve checked in on him more often or something? She’d been utterly oblivious. Her stomach turned remembering all the times she’d pranced about the house in booty shorts, or bra-less in skimpy t-shirts; had he been checking her out all along? Cripes. She didn’t want to think about it. She had enough to think about watching him check her out right now.
“What you’re looking at,” Norman said to Max, his deep voice booming overhead, “is prime punani.”
Oh God!
May wished she could bury her face in a pillow. She’d never get used to how Norman could so flagrantly talk about her body parts. Albeit, while jarring in the beginning, his vulgarity had grown on her, even got her juices flowing more often than not, but she’d prefer if he saved it for when her brother wasn’t in the room!
Oh, who was she kidding? Her relationship with Max had gone so far sideways who could ever see it coming back to the straight and narrow? Not only had he groped and slobbered all over her breasts, he’d literally tried to grab her by the pussy. If Norman wasn’t in the room, she still might’ve been fighting him off right now. He’d gotten stronger since they last play-wrestled as children but, like back then, she’d never let him get the upper hand. The only reason he could ogle her underwear right now was because she trusted Norman, and trusted that, in some roundabout way, all this might help her little brother outwrestle his perversions.
Norman pulled her thong up by the waistband, wedging a little of the scanty lace into her plump folds. “Looks scrumptious, doesn’t it?”
“Uh huh,” he mumbled mindlessly, with hungry eyes set on her lacey cameltoe and the wet blotch staining where her lips touched. For a second, she saw that unduly craze behind his spectacles again, that look that said he could drop the Xtransceiver and plunge his face into her crotch at any second. And with Norman holding her legs apart and firmly in the air, she’d be helpless to stop him. Thankfully, all Max did was stare intently.
“Pussy comes in all shapes and sizes,” Norman explained. “You can have a lot of fun getting to know your way around them. But here, let me give you some basics.” He scooted out from under her to join Max at the foot of the bed.
May enjoyed the freedom of stretching her legs for all of five seconds before Norman parted them again, this time spread-eagled with her sex and inner thighs facing the light above. Looking down, she felt as though she was on some sort of examination table, but with two stooges bearing down her womanly bits in lieu of a gynaecologist.
Norman so casually detailed how he loved the shape of her mound, the way her puffy lips hid her inner folds, the way her slit looked so cute, innocent and jammed tight. Max nodded along in supposed agreement. She didn’t know what to think about her little brother admitting he liked the shape of her pussy. Watching them discuss the ins and outs of her genitalia made her realise it was the first time she’d seen them on the same page since Mom dumped Norman. Who would’ve thunk bonding over their shared, inappropriate attraction to her would’ve been the sowing seeds for a potential truce?
May felt a finger pull the wedged lace out of her pussy and tug it to the side, leaving her open and bare to their scrutiny.
“Whoa…” Max gaped.
“Beautiful, isn’t it? And look.” Norman used two fingers to pry her fleshy folds apart and reveal the slick petals of her sex.
“So… pink…”
“Right? And you see how it’s glistening all long here?”
“Mhm.”
“That’s how you know they’re ready for it,” Norman hinted. “This sopping, little cunt is practically begging to be ploughed.” May blushed, knowing she had two males ogling her sex in an aroused state. “And see that pink button peeking out at the top? That’s where you can work a lot of magic. But,” he quickly added, “you have to work up to it first. Observe.”
Wait, observe? Observe what?! What was he going to –
“Ooh…” She felt something slick and muscly stroke the insides of her petals. May raised her head off the bed to investigate and met Norman’s lustful eyes peeking over her mound. He brushed his tongue up and down her sex while Max held the Xtransceiver over his shoulder to luminate his workspace. She hissed, struggling to contain the pleasure shooting to every extremity in her body.
Norman broke contact sporadically to enlighten Max on exactly where and how he was feeding on her plum. May grew increasingly frustrated every time he stopped to teach; could he just shut up and eat her out already? This was torture! She resorted to fondling her breasts for extra stimulation.
“And this,” Norman said, “is one of my secret weapons.” Raising his index and middle fingers in the air, he simulated a ‘come here’ motion. “Observe.” He pushed the digits through her tight entrance and applied the gesture to immediate effect.
May cried out uncontrollably. He ramped up the pleasure by simultaneously flicking his tongue over her clitoris. The double-barrelled attack had her squirming on her sheets, dying from intense pleasure. She sensed him about to pause for explanation, but forcefully locked her legs around his noggin to keep him focused. Sorry, Max! School’s out! Her orgasm couldn’t wait!
She grasped and clawed at the covers with outstretched arms. Max dug his fingers into Norman’s shoulder; watching the intensity rack her sensitive body was an intense experience in itself. She moaned and whined and cursed and pleaded for the expert tongue and digits not to stop. Whatever lust he’d failed to lap up dribbled down his chin to form a growing puddle on her bed. Her chest heaved in rapid beats as she twisted her exposed nipple. The onslaught on several erogenous points all at once culminated in a powerful orgasm that stole her breath and arced her spine off the bed.
Norman vacated her pussy and allowed her rigid form to cool back down on her sheets. Her tense thighs eased and loosened their grip on his cranium. All three of them needed a breather after that one.
Oh, Arceus. May covered her face with both hands. Can’t believe I just came like that in front of Max!
Her little brother was the first to speak and summed up the spectacle in one, breathy word. “Awesome.”
Norman gave a short exhale. “You’re welcome.” It wasn’t clear which one of them that was directed towards.
“Um…” Max itched the tip of his nose nervously. “Can I give it a shot, too?”
“No!” May blurted and threw down the nightdress to cover herself up. Gosh, why wasn’t he more unsettled about all this? Didn’t it matter even a smidgen anymore that they were blood-related?
At least Norman was on her side. Kind of. “No can do, Max,” he said. “That right there is daddy’s pussy. No one touches it but me. This demonstration was strictly for educational purposes. Hope you understand?”
“I guess…”
Norman glanced at the strain in the youngster’s trousers and sighed with pity. “All right, son, tell you what you can do. Get up there and give your big sister a good ol’ titty-fuck. I know for a fact she’s a sucker for them.”
“Yes, sir!” Max practically jumped out of his pants. He tossed Norman the Xtransceiver before pulling down his soggy trousers and green boxers in one go.
May wasn’t trying to look; it just so happened her one eye was glancing in that direction when Max unveiled himself. His little pecker was like a pink thumb with a hood protruding from his groin. She couldn’t tell if he was fully erect because, while his penis stood rigid and horizontal, his foreskin hadn’t retracted all the way. He moved a hand to hide it and May looked away awkwardly, hoping he didn’t think she was actually interested in seeing what he was packing (or not packing).
“Don’t worry about being hung,” Norman said. “You can still do damage if you use it right. And there’s always other stuff you can do to work around it.”
“Other stuff?”
“A lesson for another day.” Norman paused. “Maybe. Anyway, get up there and show her what you’re made of!”
“R-right…”
Oh dear, God… May fretted as he climbed onto her bed. Is this actually happening? Her worst nightmare, watching her little brother crawl over her half-naked body, his li’l wang dangling between his legs. He straddled her midriff and rested his junk on her abdomen. With her face turned to the side, she sensed him leaning over to look her in the eye, but she refused to reciprocate. Awkward…
“May.”
“What?” she grumbled out the side of her mouth.
“Could you look at me for a second?”
“Why?”
“I just… I just want to tell you something.”
“Say it.”
“Look at me first.”
“Why?”
He sighed. “Fine. Well, I just wanted to say – and this might sound weird coming from me –”
“Jeez, Max, then maybe don’t say it?”
“You’re a natural beauty.” He did anyway. “I’ve seen what you look like first thing in the morning, last thing before you go to bed, and everything in between… you’re stunning… any guy would be lucky to wake up next to your pretty face. I kind of don’t blame Norman. If I wasn’t your brother –”
“Stop. Please.” She covered her ears. “You’re making this way weirder than it already is.” The last thing she wanted was to give him the impression this would become a regular thing. There would be no sharing the shower in the morning, no sneaking into her bedroom in the middle of the night and certainly no rumpy pumpy while Mom slept across the hall. He could get any such thoughts out of his head immediately.
“Okay,” he groaned. “We’ll do it your way. Let’s just get down to it, huh? One thing you should know though…” His voice suddenly took a dark, lower tone. “Norman didn’t say anything about the hole in your face,” he muttered dangerously. “When I’m done fucking your tits raw, you’re going to open that fucking mouth and I’m going to –”
She whipped a murderous glare his way, silencing him dead. Who the hell did he think he was talking to? He wanted so bad to be a mini-Norman it would be funny if it wasn’t sad. Ironic, too, given his supposed hatred for the man in years gone past.
“Aha!” Max said, suddenly cheery again. “There she is. Ah, you look nice today! Now we can start.”
May rolled her eyes after realising it had been a ploy to get her to look.
“What?” He said, innocently. “Can’t blame me for wanting to look in your eyes while I’m doing this.” He uncovered her remaining breast then parted her fleshy mounds to carve out a valley. May felt his little pecker sink into her bosom. Ew. He pushed her breasts together and enveloped himself with a carnal grunt. “You have no idea how long I’ve been waiting to do this!”
The scary part: she believed him.
Max began pumping into the crevice of her breasts.
“Attaboy!” Norman encouraged. He walked to the side of the bed, bringing the roving light with him. “Get in there, son! Fuck the stuffing out of those big tits! Just remember, the only thing you want to avoid is –”
“ARRGGGGGH!”
“…cumming too early.”
May counted five and a half pumps before she felt something warm and sticky ooze down her sternum. “Ew, Max!” His yellowish semen seeped into the small indent at the base of her throat before splitting down either side her neck. She sat up, forcing the flaccid, little prick to wilt out of her bosom.
Norman rubbed his forehead with disappointment. “That’s okay. Rookie mistake.” He handed the Xtransceiver back to Max. “Here. You’re benched, kid.”
. . .
Only five feet separated brother and sister. They sat face to face, Max on a vanity chair, May on the edge of her bed. A blue flash lit the stormy night outside her window. As she looked him dead in the eyes, sweat trailed down the bridge of his nose, threatening a slip of his glasses. His face was twitchy while hers appeared deadpan and locked in concentration. Because unlike Max, she didn’t have the comfort of a cushion underneath her.
May’s bare feet hovered a few inches above a bigger pair of feet planted on the floor, her thong dangling off one ankle. Her smooth, milky legs rested on tanned, hairy limbs; her supple thighs half the breadth of the muscular pair beneath them; she might as well have been sitting on tree trunks. Max’s light followed the conjoined set of limbs right up till where her nightdress curtained the juncture between their thighs. He didn’t need to see the hidden particulars to work out their configuration; her strained expression told it all, the story of a cylindrical peg and a small hole.
Norman was cloaked in the darkness behind her and only his hands and legs emerged into the light. He made for a rigid human chair, harder than a nail to sit on, but secure in his hands around her little waist. The bodice of her nightie lay heaped in her lap, and her large, naked bust reflected in Max’s spectacles. He had his sights jumping above and below her neckline, trying his best to hold their light source steady. It was incredibly hard.
Her open mouth grew wider and wider the lower she sank into her seat. She hit the bottom and a lurid exhale stumbled from her lips. Max thought he understood human anatomy pretty well and yet it boggled his mind how the tiny hole Norman had pointed out to him earlier could accommodate such enormity. The tight fit squeezed a grunt out of the enveloped man. Then May slowly raised up and slid back down all over again.
Max read her tentative rhythm as a means to readjust; apparently her pussy had tightened up since ‘daddy’ last ploughed it. Her cheeks were rosy but she dropped the ‘shy girl’ act in front of the Xtransceiver, though Max couldn’t tell if it was because she’d grown comfortable with him watching or was too preoccupied to worry about anyone sitting across from her. Max was delighted to be privy of this either way, only wishing he had the x-ray vision to see his sister splitting herself down the middle.
Suddenly, Norman decided he’d tolerated her leisurely cadence long enough. Trusting his ‘little girl’ was adequately adjusted, he forced her thighs wide apart to accommodate himself and ramped up the pace considerably. May went from grinding in his lap to bouncing on it relentlessly.
He slid his butt off the bed to intensify the angle of his thrusts then bucked his hips fast and hard. Max ogled as the man’s entire scrotum fell out the bottom of her nightdress and zipped right back in with violent slaps. His powerful thighs clapped the undersides of hers and thrusted her light body into the air, rocking her jiggly tits into motion. Cry after cry poured from her lips like a waterfall.
Max… couldn’t stop gaping. Norman might’ve benched him but, in doing so, also gifted him a front row seat to his sister’s reckoning. She couldn’t bring herself to look at Max while she wept with pleasure from the intense railing. So intense and in his face, Max could feel the energy radiating off the copulating pair, hear the union of their sex smacking right in his ears. It looked as though his ‘not-so-innocent’ sister enjoyed a good dicking as much as any slut he’d caught on camera. He started getting hard again.
Max didn’t know when he’d switched allegiances but he found himself secretly rooting for Norman. If the scrawny boy couldn’t do it himself, he’d take great pleasure in watching a strong buck obliterate his slutty sister. The man he once considered ‘dad’ really did him a solid on this one. Give it to her good!
As if reading his mind, Norman scooted back on the bed and dragged May along with him, holding her up by the waist while she balanced on her haunches. With their groins facing his way, Max could finally peek inside the mouth of her nightdress, getting his first glimpse of her pink pussy stretched to its limits. Norman was of such length that, even with his butt on the bed and her pussy several inches in the air, a part of him remained inside her. Whoa, Max thought, if she could fit that in there then she could fit anything.
Max watched with amazement as Norman’s entire shlong kept going up and up and up until his ball-sack slapped her hovering pussy. PLAP! PLAP! PLAP! He impaled her again and again to a chorus of high-pitched moans.
Before Max knew it, he was (shakily) holding the Xtransceiver in one hand and masturbating in the other. Seeing as penetration wouldn’t be part of Norman’s sex-ed curriculum, he might as well have helped himself to a finish.
Witnessing a live sex performance was undoubtedly the pinnacle of his short-lived career in voyeurism. Even if he’d been tempted to return to private investigating, he’d never get the same thrill from a computer screen in some cold, lonely room. Max was truly over it. And, perhaps, all thanks to the two unlikeliest people he could’ve ever imagined.
The light in his hand abruptly dimmed. His Xtransceiver showed the red, flashing icon of a dying battery. Crap! Their only light source had less than five minutes left in it and he wasn’t done yet. He didn’t want to be done yet. And, judging by the oomph in Norman’s thrusts, he didn’t want to be done yet either.
Max scanned the room for an alternative and got an idea when he reached the window. It wasn’t exactly sunny outside, but the hue of night could at least add some contrast to the room? He rushed past the romping pair and threw the curtains open. They were too busy enjoying each other to take notice. Faint-blue light filtered into the room, shading Norman and May’s contours with a sapphire glaze, and just enough visibility to walk back to his seat without stumbling over anything.
The Xtransceiver shut off. He thanked the device before placing it next to the wedding ring on May’s dresser.
Now, where was I?
The young voyeur was back on the sidelines watching Norman twist a handful of his sister’s hair in a fist whilst fucking her in doggy. Max loved seeing her on all fours like the Poochyena in heat that she was. Only a horny, little girl with daddy issues could fuck her mother’s ex-fiancé, twice, with no shame or protection. Max could not imagine the chaos that would ensue if Norman got her pregnant.
Granted, the Petalburg Gym Leader appeared to be in perfect control of his faculties, unlikely to finish a second sooner than he wanted to, wherever he wanted to. Max was jealous of the man’s stamina; two seconds inside May would’ve probably been enough to coax the cum right out of him, and have them all fretting over a potential incest baby. Norman had probably been right to bar him from his sister’s sweet pussy.
Max kept his wank-hand strong and upped the pressure to match the pace of the raunchy couple. But there was no keeping up with the Petalburg Gym Leader.
While he had the teenage girl bent over, he ripped the nightdress off her back and shoved her naked body face-first into the pillows. Then he laid his entire weight on top of her. She almost disappeared into the mattress but Max could hear her muffled moans as the large man repeatedly dropped his pelvis on her bouncy ass. When he got done planking May, he flipped her onto her back and hauled her feet right up to his shoulders, pounding her hard into the bed as her outstretched legs bobbled under his chest.
Max fapped faster and faster.
Over and above Norman’s stamina, Max was jealous of his strength and vigour, too, of the way he bullied May into any position he liked, then made her love each and every one of them. It might’ve been pouring outside but the real storm raged on that bed. May was tossed and turned and flipped and folded through a whirlwind of positions as Norman took full advantage of her young and bendable body. Max hadn’t been quick enough to seize her pussy. And he couldn’t pin her down long enough to penetrate her, let alone wrestle her into a full nelson and have her screaming in rapture like Norman did. Now that he’d put the camera down, maybe it was time to lift a barbell?
The next time he and May wound up in a tussle – if there was a next time – he’d for sure be the one standing tall after getting his way with her. He’d prove he could be just as passionate as Norman, if she let him.
Granted, not even the storm was as passionate as Norman, the patter of his thrusts louder and faster than the raindrops striking the window. He came down on her like lightning and sizzled her ass with thunderclaps. All the sleeping electronics made for an uncanny silence in which the ruckus from May’s bedroom was carried throughout the house. Heck, if the window were open, her erotic howls might’ve woken half the neighbourhood, and the crude plaps of naked bodies coming together would leave no mystery as to what was happening in that dark, upstairs bedroom.
After what felt like hours of Norman dominating his teenage sister, he lay back and allowed her to take the reins. As May balanced herself with both hands on his thick, broad chest, Max imagined what it would be like to be Norman in that moment, to have her slamming her wet heat down on him, to feel her ass bouncing on his upper thighs, to smell the sex pouring out her pores, to watch the undersides of her massive jugs flopping down at his face, to see the deep lust clouding her sapphire orbs. Max imagined his sister riding him so hard his cracked glasses would be rocking lopsidedly across his stupefied face.
He could dream…
And keep beating off in envy of the Gym Leader.
Norman held on for dear life while the vivacious youngster showed him what she was made of. His wife (soon-to-be former wife) hadn’t humped him this raggedly since they first got together, if ever. He’d taught his little girl well on how to please daddy and intended to bear her fruits for as long as she craved his manhood. This was just the beginning. Who knew where the wind would blow them tomorrow? If he hadn’t convinced her to let him tag along on her journey by now, nothing would.
In the throes of riding him to oblivion, her young and tight, little pussy squeezed on his shaft. “Oh, shit!” That was a new one! “S-slow down, baby.” He panted. “You’re going to make daddy cum.”
“I know.” She gave a dark, dangerous giggle. “I want you to. Mmm, yes… cum inside me, daddy…”
That was further than even he expected her to go. “May…?”
“Please…” She whined and clamped down on him even tighter. “Please, daddy… I need your cum…”
“May… that’s so…” Hot? He felt this sudden urge to empty his loaded sack into her young womb. It must’ve been a safe day if she was encouraging him to? Still, it was a crazy risk to take. And besides, he couldn’t be done yet. There was still one thing he needed to do. Mustering all his willpower not to flood her naughty, little cunt right there and then, he clutched her by the hips and forced her to stop.
“No fair!” She was panting heavily, clearly in need of a breather despite her urgency to ride it out till the end. “What gives?”
“What gives,” Norman said, “is we’re not alone.” Something she’d clearly forgotten.
She rolled her eyes irritably. “Meh. He got his show.”
“Yes. And now, he’ll get his encore.”
“His what now?”
“Hey, kid!” Norman shouted past her shoulder.
“Uh, ye-yeah?!” They heard him scrambling to his feet, most likely thinking they hadn’t realised he was masturbating all this time.
“Get up here,” Norman said. May raised her brow quizzically and he gave her his signature ‘just trust me’ grin. “Stand behind your sister.”
The tail end of the bed dipped with added weight. A gangly contour loomed tall behind May, glasses glaring in a flash of lightning. She fought the urge to look back at the presence she sensed; instead, her flummoxed expression asked Norman the question, ‘what’s going on?’
Norman moved his hands from her hips to her ass cheeks and, without warning or explanation, spread them apart, exposing her anus to the boy lurking behind her. Her eyes grew wide as Norman’s intentions dawned on her.
“A virgin hole for a virgin cock,” he suggested.
“You… you can’t be serious…”
“What? You’ve been fucked in the ass before?”
“No but –”
“I think you mean, ‘yes butt’.” He winked, then spread her cheeks even further apart.
“Daddy, he’s my brother!”
“Shh… daddy knows what he’s doing, okay, sweetie?” Norman swiped the honey surrounding her stuffed pussy and used it to lubricate her tiny ring of muscle. She knew then there was no talking him out of it.
“Max, wait!” She glanced over her shoulder hoping to persuade her little brother but he was already shining spit over his dick-head which, coincidentally, was now bare of his fully retracted foreskin. Her eyes flickered anxiously at his resurrected member.
“Hey,” Norman spoke softly to her. “We don’t have to if you don’t want to. But it would make daddy really happy if you did. I promise, you won’t regret it, okay? Look at me.” He put on a resolute visage. “You got this. Right?”
The confidence in his steely gaze melted away the trepidation on her face. “Okay,” she decided. “Only for you, daddy.”
Norman grinned with pride. Raising his right hand off her cheek, he beckoned Max to come closer.
May pinched her eyes shut as she felt a third hand press on the small of her back. So, Max really wants to go through with this, huh? She shouldn’t have been surprised after all the revelations laid bare tonight. Still, when the crown of his sleek penis touched her asshole, she shivered. No amount of preparation could ready you for your own brother knocking at your backdoor. Norman’s response to her shudder was a firmer grip on her parted cheeks, ensuring she’d remain in place throughout the imminent penetration.
Look at these two working together, she thought. It might’ve been heart-warming if her anus wasn’t on the brink of corruption. Ah well, stranger things have brought families together… right? Probably not…
Then she felt it. A blunt pressure wedging its way into the crevice of her ass cheeks. She gave a nervous wince which only intensified her resistance against the foreign object. Max complained it was too tight for him to push through. Norman urged her to relax while he applied more of her natural lubricant to the sealed ring of muscle. Max, too, rubbed his saliva between her cheeks and round his own dick-head. They tried again and, after much strain and oiling, her anus began to give in.
His tip breached her rectum. Her eyes shot open. Max hadn’t looked that big but the tightness of her sphincter amplified his girth. He forced in an entire inch and her nails dug into Norman’s arms. She felt stuffed already.
It was an odd sensation having her anal cavity explored; not painful, surprisingly, but unusual in how it pressured her insides. As Max crawled further into her bowels, she built up this sensation of needing to go, but after he developed a comfortable rhythm, all she could think about was how full it felt getting butt-railed by her little brother. He almost felt as big as Norman did in her vagina. She let out strained, groaning noises in a desperate attempt to muffle any would-be cries of pleasure; no way she’d give Max the satisfaction of knowing he was kind of making her feel good back there.
Mercifully, she didn’t need to see her butt invader. She could draw up and colour whatever face she wanted to associate with the wayward gratification. But Max seemed set on ruining her fantasies with loud, shameless grunts.
“Ohh! Arceus, May!” he cried with rapture, his hips crashing down on her ass. “Your butthole is… incredible! So- ahh… so snug and tight!”
“Shu- hnnng- sh-shut up, M-Max…” She grumbled. And keep fucking me in the ass…
Norman chuckled listening to the teenage siblings on top of him. “You two never stop arguing do you? Even in the middle of butt-fucking!” The Petalburg Gym Leader, who’d remained hard as a steel pipe and lodged inside her other hole, thrusted himself back into the action. May squealed at his abrupt recommencing. “Ah, yes!” He gave a husky grunt. “Your pussy’s gotten even wetter since you took it up the ass. Hear that, Max? I think we’ve got a nympho on our hands!”
“A… nympho?” She shook her head despite moans spilling out to the contrary.
“I think you’re right!” A breathless Max exclaimed from behind her.
“How about it, son?” Norman said. “Let’s give your big sister the kind of pounding she’s so desperately begging for?”
“Okay, dad!”
May wondered if he even realised what he’d just called Norman. Drunken in their lust for her addictive orifices, the newly acquainted father and son duo pumped into her sandwiched body simultaneously. It started with awkward, mistimed thrusts as both dicks sought to impose themselves recklessly, Norman’s much bigger balls swinging up and grazing the young boy’s sack. Their swords crossed a few more times before Norman instructed his ‘son’ to take his lead.
And so it began.
Each dick took a turn filling its respective hole. May’s pleasure centres were overwhelmed by the alternating pumps, Norman thrusting up her gash then Max burrowing through her asshole a second later. Her bed springs whined under the pile of bodies romping on top of it. Before tonight, she’d only ever fucked one boy in her bedroom and it hadn’t been half as intense as the two ploughing her good right now, a man close enough to be her father, a boy who’d always been her brother. Personal misgivings and ideologies had kept them apart, but now, only her perineum separated them. They tag-teamed her like some random slut they’d picked up off the street, grunting like animals as she wept with inexplicable pleasure. A flash of lightning revealed the sordid tower of naked bodies in all their glory. All one, all united, all family.
All love.
Tonight, her daddy and brother banged together her most powerful orgasm yet, her thunderous cry ripping through the storm of all storms.
Tonight, on the eve of a fresh start, virginities were broken and truces came together, signed in the drizzling ink of male essence. Max was the first to leave his gooey signature in his sister’s anal cavity. Then Norman flooded his little girl with so much cum it began gushing out the corners of her pussy before he’d even unplugged himself.
May collapsed onto his chest, unable to hold herself up a second longer, and Max soon dropped to Norman’s other side, his panting face coated with his sweat.
Norman reclined against the pillows and allowed his children to fall asleep on either side of him. A tired but happy smile touched his face. He lay deep in thought as the storm waned outside. When he could hear the kids’ snores over the pattering rain, he figured it was time to go. He kissed May on the forehead and ruffled the boy’s hair before getting up without stirring them.
After the kind of night they had, he wouldn’t be surprised if they woke up late for their pokémon journeys in the morning. He slipped out of May’s bedroom and closed the door gently behind him.
. . .
The morning sun tinted the clear skies with a new, hearty glow, like warm honey poured across an ocean of blue with little, floating marshmallows. Shrinking puddles lay scattered along the asphalt leading out of the city. Remnants of the storm dripped off tree leaves and furnished the scent of wet grass, of new beginnings, of endless possibilities.
It was a new day and, stood at the forked entrance of Petalburg Woods, three geared-up travellers were ready to branch into fresh starts.
Max had avoided eye contact with May since waking up in her bed, next to her used and naked body. He’d sensed she was doing the same. It was only after Norman joined them did a little friendly banter lessen the awkwardness. But now, they’d reached a fork in the road, with Norman and May deciding they’d wanted to start off their journey heading towards Rustboro City, and Max opting to go through Petalburg Woods, where he’d find the best opportunities to start building his pokémon team.
“Well,” Norman said, with a yawn and a stretch. “I guess this is it.”
Max scanned each wooden sign pointing them down their respective paths. “I guess it is.”
“Yeah…” May said, as if only to fill an awkward silence. She seemed rather subdued and distant from her usual self.
Max could understand why. Honestly, he felt much the same; it was one thing doing everything they had in the blinding dark, and another to face the person you did those things with in plain daylight, especially if they happened to be a family member.
“Right,” Norman said. He extended a hand to Max. “I wish you the best of luck, young man. And hey, now that we’re both travelling Trainers again, we might have to have a battle next time we cross paths!”
Max grinned at the prospect. “You betcha!” He accepted Norman’s future challenge with an enthusiastic handshake. No sooner had he released the man then had he found himself crushed in a bone-crunching hug. “M-May…? I can’t… breathe.”
She let go and stepped back with a bittersweet smile. “Good luck, Max.”
The biggest smile brightened up his face. She didn’t hate him. It might’ve been a while till their relationship went back to ‘normal’, but she didn’t hate him! “Thanks, May. You, too. Both of you!”
Norman nodded in acknowledgement. He held May’s hand in clear view of her little brother, and there was not an ounce of malice to go around.
“Oh!” Max suddenly remembered something as the two lovers turned to leave.
“What is it?” May asked.
He brandished a certain, infamous USB drive from one of his side pockets. Dropped it in a muddy puddle. Then crushed it underfoot.
“Heh.” Norman chuckled and nudged May. “Told you he’d do the right thing.”
“Yeah.” May beamed from ear to ear. “I knew I was right to trust you.” They shared a sweet kiss.
“And don’t worry,” Max said. “I didn’t make copies or anything like that. The only people who’ll ever know what happened last night are standing right here.”
“Last night?” Norman rubbed his chin. “What happened last night?”
May shrugged wearing puzzlement on her face. “Haven’t got a clue.”
Max nodded with a knowing grin. He whistled his way down the left path and, down the right, May and Norman walked hand-in-hand towards the horizon.
Author’s Notes: Thanks for reading! Please rate and drop a review to let me know what you thought of this fic!
Special credit goes to ScorpDK for the artwork that inspired this fan fic cover! As of the time of this writing, you can find more of the artist’s work here:
https://www.deviantart.com/scorpdk
Well, I can’t say the little devil on my isn’t a little grump no one faced any poetic justice for their bad behaviour. Though, personal deviance aside, I do appreciate a happy ending.
Plus, May seems to have come out of the whole ordeal unscathed (if a bit stickey). I do feel kind of bad for Norman’s second wife, though. But all is fair in love, war, and smut; I guess.
Really satisfied with how everything came together. And it’s nice that (for now, atleast) Max & Norman appear to be putting some of their negative traits behind them. Hopefully neither of these habbits come back to bite May in her juicey ass; or atleast make for some hot action if they do.
Your updates are always worth the wait! Can’t wait to see what comes down the pipeline next. 😁👍
Yeah, I get your meaning. Arguably, Norman is the only one who lost anything meaningful to him, and even that might be seen as more of a sacrifice than an out-and-out loss. Have always felt happy endings are a matter of character perspective anyway, and I usually don’t go out of my way to ensure the MCs get theirs. In this case, just so happened all the resolutions to their arcs came together ‘happily’.
For fun’s sake, I’ll tell you what my alternative ending would’ve been, or rather, the initial direction I considered taking. I was going to leave Norman out of the last three chapters altogether. Somehow, May and Max would’ve wound up getting to ‘know each other better’, and I was going to bring Sonia back in a twist that would’ve had her capture the siblings in the act. She’d then oust them and claim her ultimate revenge on Max who’d ruined her life in the first chapter. There would’ve been a little more poetic justice in that ending I think.
Now that Max has got his own hands dirty, I don’t think he can look at Norman with the same judgement he had before haha. As for May, I really don’t know how she’d handle another intense scenario involving those two!
Thanks! I really enjoy reading your comments and feedback on my stories. 😀
Hello jj!
Well, after the reading of the new three chapters, I can give to you a review 🙂
Soo… Interesting how you move all the things, again. I have the admit, the end was totally unexpected. I guessed a end with May with max… I don’t know with these two paired, but with a scene with these two she helping him to solve hes vouyerism problems and well. Give to him a taste of her xd. But… with norman again? And all of them concilied with a estrange family trio with norman giving a definitive step with May… definitendly unexptected for me but a good end 🙂
So… Interesting really how is may… On the last two stories. Is interesting give a comparative between the May of “doing the oakey pockey” and of this fics, and doing contrast with the less… sexually active May of “May valentines surprise” or “growing pokéballs”… I love how you can give to a same character two different angles or point of view depending the nature of the story.
But, well. the story ended being a May x Norman story, with the poihnt of view of a perturbed Max.
A, and other thing that was interesting how do you implemented, was… At first time (reading the first two chapters) that the world was aparenting to be totally disconnected from Ash and company, or the travel throug Hoen, but with a subtle turn on the third chapter, you can discober that the story is setted on an alternative setting, a few years latters than the Hoen travel with only one change. Norman wasn’t the biological dad of Max and May, but how them ends calling hes as dad… Was a insest without be a complete insest?
But well. as usual, awesome job, JJ. thanks for writing, and thanks for upload the complete PDF.
waiting for more fics!
thanks!
Hi there!
Yeah, there was a strange three-way dance happening amongst the siblings and Norman. In a way, Norman contributed to Max having a perverted view of May after Max caught them in the act, and in the end Norman was the middle man to ‘smoothen’ their warped familial tie. It was a little unexpected for me too because when I’d finished chapter 2, I thought I was done with Norman’s arc in this fic.
You probably already guessed it by now but May is my favourite PokeGirl haha. I could probably write 10 more fanfics centered around May, but I think people will eventually get tired of it or want to see different PokeGirls. So my compromise is try to reflect different sides or versions of May in each fic. Can only do that so much without making her OOC though, so I’m glad she still comes across as May despite her varying portrayals in every fic.
I’d written Chapter 1 and 2 together, and at the time, had no idea how future chapters would pan out. I didn’t mention Ash and co in the first couple of chapters because I genuinely didn’t know it might be relevant information later on lol. That’s one of the tricky parts about publishing fanfiction chapter by chapter. In the end though, I think it all ended up being coherent enough.
Thanks for reading and for the review as always! I’m going to carry on with creating complete PDFs for all my stories. It worked out well here because I ended up publishing all three chapters at once, but for some fics, it might take a little longer to get he full PDF since I’ll be doing it chapter by chapter (and there’s no point making a full PDF until the entire story is done).
Take care and thanks for the suggestion!
Hello!
Don’t worry. Is clear that May is my fav pokegirlg too. And for me, I can read any more fics about her on any situation xd. But yea, we have to think on the other public 🙂
And don’t take care about the fanfics under publishing. The complete pdf is only for that writings that reached the end chapter. Obviously if you have a fic that is under publication, don’t create the full pdf.
And as you say. IS the magic about write without the full plan of the story. In some moments you have a idea for story, mayve the start, climax or end, but not all parts. You create them at the time that you’re writing. And of course if you publish the chapter when it is finished and didn’t wait to the next chapters to check them as a full story… Well these fun things happen. But, when you’re a skilled writer, can handle this without problem and show them without any surprise. This is that case. You mention Ash and co only when that information was relevant. :3
Well. thanks for all! jj!
Bye!
Hahaha, cheers to May!
Yeah, writing a story on the fly is not for everybody. My experience is pretty much how you’ve put it – I have a few plot points and work the story to hit each one as I go. Thanks for your feedback and your kind words as always. Glad the “magic” is still working for you. 😀 And I think your PDF idea was a great one, so thanks for that, too.
Till next time!
Always love a fanfiction that has May getting double penetrated, and love the detail in Chapter 4 of how May hard nipples were. Looking forward for your next fanfiction, hope it has item Rosa or dawn in it. Like you May is my favorite poke girl.
We need more of those kind of fan fics, don’t we? 😛 Well, my next update is going to be May’s Valentine’s Surprise – quite an altered version of May to say the least – but it does include Rosa. May and Dawn sounds good and will definitely write something for them further down the line.
So, this one is a little weird, and not because of its topics
So, May, Max and Norman, eh? Interesting, by the way you wrote this story, i was expecting Norman to only be a plot device, only something to get the two siblings together, i wasn’t expecting him to reappear let alone participate in the sex at all
This story seems something…directionless, like if it wasn’t really sure where it is going, at the beginning its about Max’s voyerism then its about him and May and then its about Norman and May and then its about May and Max again, it feels like there were many plots in this one, and it also feels like they drag on for a bit, this story is long, normally is a good thing, but with this one it feels like it was extended more artificially, it really didn’t need to be 5 chapters long, i’ll tell you that
Max as a protagonist is good and his relationship with May is great, i really like how you write many stories with different styles of Mays but they all still feel like the same character
Norman in this story is….ok, he feels a little bit forced into it by the 4th chapter, i thought that his role was going to be the one to corrupt May and Max and let them see the ugly truth, it kinda happens that way but is also more focused in a “sex guide/master” way, its…..ok
With Norman, May and Max there is a weird three-way dance between them, the focus is changed between the three of them in the last 2 chapters, however, i must say that neither May or Norman motives are all that developed beside “We like to fuck”, there isn’t really a lot of conflict there
Max motive and theme (Voyerism) is very good but it feels like it doesn’t feel like it has a good resolution, there is neither an acceptance, condenation or resolution of his voyerism, there is only “Well, you are going to get better kid” at the end
In fact, i don’t really think that any of the resolutions in this story are really good, they seem very forced to get a happy ending for the characters, May and Norman just get together and i already talked about Max, it feels like all the drama and conflict and build-up wasn’t really worth it with that kind of resolution
Talking about Build-Up, i know that a characteristic of your writing is building up the tension and the conflict and the atmosphere so all the pieces fit together and the inevitable sex scene will be more satisfying, but i must say that this is the story where you blue-balled us more, the sexual activity in this story is scarce and quick, like the lightning in this chapter, it goes as fast as it comes, normally, quick scenes are fun and great but this one felt like it really failed on delivering on the sex, i love the build up, but after all, if the sex isn’t that satisfying after all , you start to wonder what was the point of that
Now i know it sounds like i hate this story but its not like that, i enjoyed this story, maybe not so much as the others but i liked it, i liked how you always take a different approach to sex, sometimes is Anal, sometimes is ogling, in this time is voyerism and i liked the use of that theme
I also like to see how your writing style evolves with time, this story really feels like a beta/test version of what would become Once Smitten Twice Bi, and its great to know that you are capable of using similar concepts and upgrade them in different stories, i’m happy to tell you that thaf fic is really a great upgrade of this fic, though of course there is always room for improvement, hmm, it makes me wonder, are we gonna get another Pokemon fic about Incest, anal and threesome in another region to complete the trilogy? One can only dream, but i always say never say never and always be open to the possibilities no matter what the media, as the girls in your stories always open up about their exciting possibilities, hahahah (MHA still hasn’t had that kind of fic, just saying)
Well, this was a good story, not great but still good, as always, i hope that you are and will be fine and that you keep showimg your love for writing erotica, thanks as always
Before finishing this, i gotta ask, i know that you keep your plans in your heart but i want to know if possible, do you have plans about expanding your future stories to other franchises/media besides those in this website? I’ll keep reading your stories still, just curious, y’know, Pokemon still has lots of regions and lots of girls in them *Wink* *Wink* *Wink*
Another MHA story would be nice tho
Hahahhahaha, always good to write on this site, see you Lemon!
Thanks so much for the in-depth review! I really appreciate your honest feedback and taking the time to share your thoughts. Reading your reviews sometimes feels like stepping into a time machine, trying to rewind my brain and remember what I was thinking when I wrote these fics. It’s funny because I often forget the finer details and plot points after publishing a story. Usually, I’ll do a proofread for any last-minute grammar and spelling errors, but after that, I rarely revisit my work. In this case, it’s been years since I read this fic, so forgive me if I don’t recall all the minor plot points!
You know, I honestly can’t remember whether I started this story before or after Once Smitten, Twice Bi. But I can say that this was one of the stories I didn’t plan out from the start. I had a clear vision up to the end of Chapter 2, but after that, it was very much a case of making it up as I went along haha. So I dunno, maybe that “directionless” feeling you got might have been a result of that. By the end, Norman’s role shifted a lot – he went from being a catalyst for May and Max to this “sex guide/master” figure, which, in hindsight, probably felt a bit contrived.
It’s never a good thing when you can feel the length of a story, suppose the intrigue and tension just wasn’t enough to sustain this storyline. My next couple of stories will be on the lengthy side, but I’d like to try my hand at writing stories that are more punchy and quicker to get to the action afterwards.
As for resolutions, yeah, they were something that evolved as the story went along, not preplanned from the beginning as mentioned before. I can see how they might feel unsatisfying. Nonetheless, I’m glad you still found aspects of the story enjoyable. And let’s be real, I don’t think anything will top Once Smitten, Twice Bi in your hierarchy, haha!
That being said, I do have another May/Norman fic in the works based on a request from a longtime reader. The plot and sex scenes aren’t entirely my own concept, so it’ll be interesting to see how it turns out.
BTW, I do have an idea for a MHA fan fic that touches on similar themes, but not sure which direction to take:
1) Ochaco x Izuku: In this version, they’re siblings, but only Ochaco goes to UA and supports the family financially through her internships, while Izuku remains Quirkless, using porn as a way to cope with his unfulfilled dreams. However, when he discovers the real source of Ochaco’s income, he realises things are far more complicated than he thought, and their worlds get intertwined in an unexpected way.
2) Ochaco x Ochaco’s Dad: Similar setup but this version features Ochaco’s father instead, who’s struggling with feelings of failure for being unable to provide for his family. When he learns what Ochaco has resorted to in order to support them, he’s overwhelmed by guilt. But as he uncovers more about her secret life, he starts developing a complex and unexpected attraction to her.
I’m torn between the two, so let me know which one you think has more potential?
As for exploring other franchises, I’m definitely open to it. There’s so much potential in different universes, and I’d love to dive into new characters and settings. I’m not sure if you’re into any of these fandoms, but I’ve been toying with ideas for Stellar Blade, Komi Can’t Communicate, Street Fighter, Fairy Tail, Dexter’s Lab (LOL), Chainsaw Man, Harry Potter, and One Punch Man, just to name a few. It all seems like a bit of a pipe dream right now, though, as I’m struggling to finish my current WIPs, let alone branch out into new ones!
Although my motivation for it has been all over the place, I’m forcing myself to complete the second and final chapter of my Mineta x Ochaco fic (Sour Grapes & Vanilla Cakes). That one will definitely be my next upload.
Thanks again for the review and the support! I appreciate your insights and enthusiasm, and I’ll keep them in mind as I move forward with new stories. Cheers!
I think you have guessed by now that some of my favorite sex stuff in stories are Incest, Water sex and multiple people (threesomes, Orgies, foursomes, etc) and as i have read, i think they are some of your favorites too, so i’ll be very happy to help you decide wich story has more potential
Ok, so let’s see:
In my opinion, Ochaco x Izuku is the one that holds the more potential, first of all because it uses a character that we know a lot of, Izuku, instead of Ochaco’s Father, but also because it lends itself to great narrative themes and scenes, and that you can practically choose whatever route you want with it
Think about it, you can explore Izuku’s Unfulfilled life, including sexual frustration, you can explore Ochaco’s stress and feeling that she needs to carry the family, the loneliness of Izuku, the pain of Ochaco
But you can also get a different angle from all of your stories, you can explore love, like, true love, not sexual lust
They might see each other in a different light after seeing each other in their most weak state, they might not be able to get out of their economic problems, but they can find comfort in each other knowing that they will always be there for the other
You can also explore guilt, maybe with Izuku wanting his sibling, or denial
The best part is that you can narrate it however you want and it won’t feel out of place, rough and dominant? You can make Izuku expert thanks to porn and Ochaco expert thanks to her job, Romantic and rookie? You can make it so they both are rookies in it and aren’t really sure how to proceed
With Ochaco x her Dad, you can explore the Guilt that comes with not only wanting Ochaco, but also not being able to provide for his family, making sex not only a way to releade stress, but also a way to heal and understand each other
In both, you can also explore the aspect of forbidden love and attraction
But, you can get even more experimental and fuse the two ideas into one, including the mother of the family, that’s right, you can do a story with a whole family, mother, father, son and daughter
Imagine that, you can expand the guilt and stress about the economic problems into all of the family members, each having their own problems make them so after they find out Ochaco’s secret, they need to reevaluate what they think about each other, and seeing how her job is what is paying the bills, maybe through it they start easing themselves into other interesting concepts, and start to find out the way to heal and understand themselves is to have a little special “conection”
Maybe there would be an special transmission on Only Fans with a Family on it? *Wink* *Wink*
Anyway you choose, i will enjoy it, nice talking to you Lemon! See you later!
Hmmm, interesting – I haven’t really thought about which kinks I’d call my favourites. I tend to lean towards certain categories depending on my mood. It would actually be an intriguing exercise to go back through my fics and see which kinks pop up the most.
Thanks for the feedback on my MHA ideas. A while ago, I started writing the Izuku version, then shifted gears to work on the Uraraka’s Dad version, only to return to Izuku again lol. And now the unfinished story has been sitting on the shelf for months as I try to nail down the direction.
You make a good point about the Izuku version possibly being stronger due to the familiarity of the characters. I also appreciate that, at its core, it’s an Ochaco x Izuku fic with a twist. There’s a lot of material to explore with Izuku’s Quirklessness and Ochaco’s desire to help her family financially. I also wanted to delve into themes of porn addiction and self-loathing through Izuku’s perspective – something I haven’t yet covered in my other stories, so there’s a fresh angle there I find appealing. My only hesitation with the sibling dynamic was whether it would feel a bit forced or contrived, and if incest is going to be a kink, perhaps it would resonate more with an existing family member rather than one invented for the sake of the story. I didn’t want it to feel like fitting a square peg into a round hole.
As for exploring “true love” as a theme, I’m not sure if that’s really my forte, haha. I’ve dabbled in writing fluff a couple of times in the past, but I find it much more satisfying when the scenes have a touch of taboo or illicitness. I think it adds an extra thrill and opens up more space for character conflict and development.
It’s funny you mention merging the two stories – that’s probably the direction I’m leaning towards most these days. I just need to develop two distinct arcs for Izuku and Ochaco’s dad that complement each other and come full circle. I hadn’t considered including Ochaco’s mom, but now that you mention it, there might be an interesting angle there worth exploring too.
Thanks again for all your feedback and suggestions!
Ah, i see, well, can’t blame you, Taboo makes things more spicy and thrilling, fluff is also sexy, but not as thrilling as you already said
I think both of your motivations and fears are correct, an Izuku x Ochaco story with them both being siblings is a fresh twist that isn’t seen normally in the stories regarding the ship, but at the same time it could become just another story with Ochaco and Izuku
I think that focusing on the sibling relationship is the key factor to make this shine, these two people who grew up together suddenly want to fuck each other? With one addicted to porn amd the other suffering to help her family? Now there is a story to tell
With Ochaco X her Dad, well, it’s actually the weaker line, because it doesn’t have the same strong character elements like being Quirkless or the porn addiction, not to mention that Ochaco’s Dad is a less known character, but you could craft something great with the themes of Guilt and forbidden attraction
Merging the two stories is, to my thinking, the correct way to do it, that way you don’t need to battle with what you want to put in the story because you could just put it all, Izuku and Ochaco’s Dad need arcs, of course, but don’t forget about Ochaco herself, she also needs an arc in the story
Now, there is a little possible problem that i see with all of this: You may just be repeating this May x Max x Norman story in which we are talking now
Yeah, it’s a different universe, and the story may be more planned out than this one, but at the same time you need to ask yourself, What is the difference between Max’s Vouyerism and Izuku’s porn addiction? What is the difference between Norman and May and Ochaco and her Dad? What will be the difference between the threesome that is inevitably going to happen between Izuku, Ochaco and their Father and the Threesome between May, Max and Norman? You need to make sure what makes a story different than the other
The story has potential, but you need to be careful to not repeat the same story beats, that is the reason why i suggested that you add Ochaco’s Mom into the mix
I’ll give some suggestions about how the story could fit her and also how to make it different:
Ochaco’s Mom, being the Matriarch of the family, is actually angry at her failure of a husband, for it’s incapacity to provide for the Family and his moping, but she is also sad at herself for not being able to both comfort her husband and children and for also not being able to help the family, but when she discovers her daughter’s true job, she not only is shocked, but also overwhelmed with feelings of desire, and she starts seeing not only Ochaco but also the other members of the family in a new light (Maybe she also has a porn addiction because in his moping her husband doesn’t really sleeps with her anymore and that’s where Izuku gets it from)
With her addition, and keeping both Izuku, Ochaco and their father, you can present a truly unique story that hasn’t really been done before, i mean, nobody really has a whole family doing it in a story, and even if it means that you need to write another arc, if you are already going to do Ochaco x Izuku x their father, you might as well go all the way and give all the family members a happy ending this time
Something that can also make the story different is that it would be great for the two siblings to have a scene alone and after that do it with the other characters, it’s different from this one, where we jump into the threesome without a one on one
Anyway, you are after all the writer and its you that decides what to write and what not, but with this story, you can explore how unfulfillment, guilt, stress and self-loathing can lead people to places that they thought impossible, you can explore how lust and desire can break through logic and even kinship in a moment of despair, ’cause when the libidos are high, the forbidden attraction only makes bottoms ache and swords raise (if you know what I’m saying hahahah) and if there is no way out of the situation that’s causing the problems, then they might just indulges themselves with the needs of their flesh
Anyway, thanks for taking the time to read my messsage, see you later
P.S: I’m intrigued by the May x Norman that you also mentioned that you are working on, if i may ask, is that the one that will have the Orgy scene? I know that you may not want to say in public, so i’m attaching my Email to this so you can tell me by Email!
Of course, i’ll understand if you want to keep close that information until the big reveal, so there is no problem if you don’t want to tell it to me! Anyway, i already talked way too much, see you then
Whoa, that’s a lot to unpack! You’ve definitely given me plenty to think about.
Yeah, at least for me, taboo adds a certain spice and thrill that fluff just doesn’t quite hit the same way. The sibling angle for an Izuku x Ochaco story does offer a fresh twist, especially when layered with themes like guilt, addiction, and the weight of responsibility. Seeing the characters going from two people who grew up together to suddenly wanting to fuck each other makes for an emotionally charged storyline.
Ochaco x her dad is definitely trickier to develop since he’s not a well-defined character in canon, but that also opens up creative freedom to flesh him out. I think that’s part of what draws me to the idea—there’s no rigid set of personality traits to stick to. Either way, the guilt and forbidden attraction themes are definitely juicy, and there’s potential there for something powerful. I do like the idea of merging the two storylines; it not only avoids having to choose between them but also creates a more layered and complex narrative.
Ochaco’s arc is the one I’m least worried about since I’ve always had a pretty solid idea of how I want it to unfold. For her, it’s more about figuring out the specific events that push her toward the direction I need her to go.
Now that we’re talking about character arcs, I also recall toying with the idea of giving Izuku a rival for her affections, like a Bakugo or Iida, someone more capable than him that makes him feel even more like a loser and eager to conquer Ochaco to get one over the guys that are supposedly more talented than he is. I also had Mina involved as a potential love interest before he ultimately ends up for Ochaco instead. Haha, damn, I’ve probably forgotten more than I remember when it comes to all the elements of this story. It’s no wonder it’s been tough to lock down a definitive plotline without feeling like it’s spiralling into contrived territory.
As for repeating story beats from May x Max x Norman, I can see why that might be a concern, but I feel confident the two stories are distinct enough. While both involve a father, son and daughter doing the nasty, the paths the characters take are pretty different. Izuku’s porn addiction serves as a coping mechanism, whereas Max’s voyeurism was an unintended consequence of his pursuits as a P.I. While both he and Izuku end up being attracted to people they aren’t supposed to, the circumstances diverge enough to keep things from being too samey.
For the most part, I’m jiving with your concept of how Ochaco’s mom could be roped in, but I’ll probably steer clear of giving her a porn addiction. I’d rather keep that struggle unique to Izuku and explore her challenges from a different angle.
The one-on-one scene between Izuku and Ochaco was always a core part of the story, and I’ve got a clear idea of how I want it to play out. The threesome with her dad was more of an afterthought—like a bonus episode rather than the main event. But now, with Ochaco’s mom in the mix, I’ll need to rethink how all four of them end up in the same room after Izuku and Ochaco’s solo moment!
As for the May and Norman fic, no orgies there—it’s a one-on-one story, and it’s actually a request from a long-time reader. The concept isn’t mine at all; they wanted a simpler, more twisted-attraction-driven plot rather than the coercion angle in Hoin’ For Hoenn. Without giving away too much, it’s essentially a story about May and Norman going on a father-daughter vacation together after Caroline suggested May take her place because she’s tied up with other responsibilities at home, but what none of them had anticipated was just how much “connecting” father and daughter end up doing on the trip.
It’s a four-chapter fic, and I’ve finished drafts of the first three chapters—just one more to go. I would’ve been done already, but I paused to finish Chapter 2 of Sour Grapes and Vanilla Cakes.
Hope that answers your question! Thanks again for the thoughtful feedback—it’s always great to hear your perspective.
Take care, and see you next time!
Hey, i’ve seen that you haven’t updated in days, i hope everything is fine and that things are good for you
Just wanted to share other ideas on how you could make the story work with all of the family
In the case of Ochaco’s Mom, you can use her Quirk in a narrative that helps to focus in the family’s economic problems
With her Quirk being stretching things, you can use her as a reflection of Deku in this story, just in this case, even though she has a Quirk, is Useless for it cannot bring money to the table, she lives in depression for that, which leaves her Unable to truly pay attention to her Child’s problems
When she discovers Ochaco’s true way of Income, and that Deku has a porn addiction product of his Unfulfilled Dreams, she is deeply affected by that and plans to step up for her, but when she sees how important Ochaco’s work is to the family economy, her mind gets to a crossroad between what is important to the family stability and how does their children feel, besides, she starts to feel conflicted when the sudden interest of her Husband and son in her daughter’s work starts to get….exciting
That way, you not only have the complete family in the inevitable sex scene, but you also add another interesting theme to your story: How the actions and feelings of the parents can reflect and impact on their children
Deku is a reflection of his mother with their combined feelings of being useless to their family and being oblivious to the harsh truth behind Ochaco’s income because of their self-loathing and depression, Ochaco is a reflection of her father with feelings of needing to do something for her family no matter the cost, anything to not be like her father and drown in failure
That way, the story becomes a dark descent of the family into lust, nothing is going to get them out of their financial problems, so every single one of the members starts accepting their role in this situation, maybe this could have been avoided if their parents weren’t so focused in their own feelings of failure and self loathing and paid more attention to their children, but now nothing can be done about it, and as Ochaco’s work and Ochaco herself starts to dig deep and deeper into each family member mind, and as the situation keeps getting dire, maybe there is no real solution to the problem, so they may as well give in to their true desires, even if it’s only a temporal way of forgetting about their problems
Yeah, don’t know how open you would be with the story like this, it’s only a suggestion, i like because it’s an adversion of “Dad has sex with someone and Mom is Unaware”, a trope that you even put in this fanfic, i like it as much as the other guy but, as i said, you already did it here, it would be very subversive to put the mother in the action instead of NTR-ing her
Anyway, you are the writer and you decide how you do it, just sharing ideas for you to see if they tick your fancy (i don’t know if that’s the way its said) and to see if they awaken some inspiration in you
Also, as i said earlier, i hope everything is fine in your life, see you then
Wow, thanks for all your insights! I appreciate it very much. I’m going to respond to this and your other messages in full. Couple of things have come up that have pushed Fan Fiction to the side. But rest assured I haven’t abandoned my current WIPs or future stories like this one.
Take care and keep well!
Just circling back to give a more in-depth response—thanks so much for the concern and for taking the time to share all those ideas, by the way. Everything’s fine on my end, just that life’s been making it trickier to balance writing and everything else lately. But don’t worry, I’m definitely not giving up on the story!
Now, Ochaco’s mom having a Quirk that lets her stretch things? Interesting, is that canon? Tbh I barely remember her brief appearances in the anime, so that might’ve slipped right past me. Either way, it’s clear neither she nor her husband are exactly bringing home the bacon with their abilities.
I can totally picture her reaction to discovering the truth about Ochaco’s ‘side hustle’—the conflict, the guilt, and the quiet resentment would be such juicy material to explore. Not to mention, discovering how both her son and husband got sucked into that world. On one hand, she’d hate it, but on the other, how do you condemn the person keeping the family afloat? That kind of emotional limbo is chef’s kiss. I suppose I’d need some kind of convenient plot device to push her fully over the edge and into the chaos with them lol.
I really love the idea of Deku reflecting his mum and Ochaco reflecting her dad—it’s such a clever parallel and honestly makes me want to lean harder into those dynamics. It adds so much depth to their motivations and struggles, which is always a win in my book. Thanks for that insight.
As for the ending, I’m not 100% sure yet. While the story does spiral into a descent of lust and desperation, I’m debating whether they claw their way out of their financial mess (with scars, obviously) or if the cost of their choices ends up outweighing the benefits. If Ochaco’s mom becomes a bigger part of the narrative, that’d definitely change the trajectory, so I’ll need to give it a good think.
Challenge accepted on getting her more involved, though! I’ll try to steer it away from the typical ‘NTR-ing her out of the loop’ trope—as you so elegantly put haha. I love how you’ve woven themes of family dynamics, reflection, and personal struggles into the narrative—it’s a really unique take. The parallels you’ve drawn between the parents and their children are especially intriguing, and I can totally see how that would add a deeper layer to the story.
It’s always exciting to see fresh perspectives like this. While I can’t promise I’ll take things in exactly this direction, your ideas have definitely sparked some inspiration! And don’t worry, ‘tick your fancy’ is 100% the right phrase.
Thanks again for reaching out and for being so supportive—I really appreciate it. Stay tuned, and I’ll do my best to make the story a good read!